Announcing the repast or reception

What the repast is

The repast is the meal or gathering after the service or the burial, where people share food and talk. Sharing a meal after a funeral is a tradition in many cultures, and it gives people time together that the service does not.

"Repast" means a meal. Families and churches call the gathering by different names: a repast, a reception, a luncheon or lunch, or simply a gathering. Use the word that sounds right to your family. Any of them is right.

It is often held in the church hall, a room at the funeral home, a restaurant, a community center or a family home.

What to include

A line about the repast needs three things:

• Where. The name of the place, and its address if guests will need to find it. "The church hall" needs no address when the service is at the church; a restaurant across town does.
• When. "Immediately following the service", "after the committal", or a time. The committal is the service at the graveside, or wherever the burial takes place. If only some guests go on to it, a time helps the others know when to arrive.
• Who is invited. Everyone, or family and close friends. The family decides, and either is fine.

A family home is different. Many families give that address by word of mouth rather than in print, because the program gives the time of the service and a house is often empty then. If you can, ask a neighbor or a friend to stay at the house during the service. There is more about what to leave out in what to put in a funeral program.

Keep the line to a sentence or two, and keep its grammar the same all the way through. Write it in the family's name, as in "The family invites you", or in your own, as in "Please join us", but not both in the same line.

If you make the program here, "After the service" is its own question, for the repast, the reception or the burial details, and it prints on the back page.

Wording when everyone is welcome

When the gathering is open to everyone at the service, say so plainly:

• All are welcome to join the family for a repast at [venue name], [street address], immediately following the service.
• The family invites you to a reception at [venue name], [street address], from 1:00 to 3:00 p.m.
• Everyone is welcome at [venue name], [street address], after the service.
• Please join us for lunch at [venue name], [street address], after the service.

In the church hall

When the gathering is in the same building as the service, the address can be left out:

• Please join the family in the church hall after the service.
• Please stay and join us for coffee and cake in the church hall.
• A repast will be served in the church hall immediately following the service. All are welcome.

After the committal

When the burial comes first, say so, and people will know when the gathering begins. Walter's program says it simply:

• Please join the family in the church hall after the committal. There will be chowder.

It tells guests where, when and, in one short sentence, what to expect. A small detail like that makes an invitation sound like the family. Other ways to say it:

• Following the committal at [cemetery name], the family welcomes everyone to a luncheon at [venue name], [street address].
• A repast will follow the interment, in the church hall.
• If you are not going on to the cemetery, please make your way to the church hall, where the family will join you after the committal.

For family and close friends

A printed line reaches everyone who holds a program. A gathering for family and close friends is clearest when the people invited hear about it directly, by phone or message, before the service. The program can then leave the line out, or say it plainly:

• Family and close friends are invited to lunch at [venue name], [street address], after the committal.
• After the service, the family will gather privately with relatives and close friends.

When the family gathers privately

When the family will be on its own after the service, a short line saves guests from wondering whether there is somewhere to go:

• The family will gather privately after the service.
• The burial and the time afterward will be private. The family thanks you for being here today.

Or leave the line out. The officiant or the funeral director can say at the close of the service what happens next, and it helps to ask them to.

Bringing food

The meal can come about in different ways. Some churches have a group that prepares and serves it after funerals. Some families have it catered or hold it at a restaurant, and some ask friends to bring dishes. A club, a class or a group the person belonged to may offer to host it as a gift to the family.

If the service is at a church, ask the church office what it can offer, and whether there is a charge for the people who prepare the meal and clear up afterward.

If friends are bringing food, arrange it before the service, by phone or message, or through the church's group. The program is read at the service, which is too late to ask anyone to cook. It helps if one person keeps the list of who is bringing what.

The program can still tell guests what to expect, as Walter's does. "Lunch will be served" or "coffee and cake" tells guests whether it is a meal, so they can plan the rest of their day. The rest of the back page, from the family's thanks to the closing lines, is in funeral program wording, section by section. For a homegoing service, the Baptist funeral program page shows where the repast goes in the program.