Graveside service order of service

What a graveside service is

There are two kinds, and it helps to know which yours will be:

• The whole service. Everything happens at the graveside. It is often small, and sometimes for the family alone, with a larger memorial service held later.
• A committal after a service elsewhere. The funeral takes place in a church or a chapel, and then everyone goes to the cemetery for a short service at the grave.

That short service is called the committal: the words and prayers with which the body is laid to rest. In many churches it is the last part of the funeral.

A simple order

A graveside service is often brief, and its order is short:

1. Gathering. Guests gather at the grave, and the casket or urn is brought to it, often carried by the pallbearers.
2. Opening words. The officiant welcomes everyone, often with a verse of scripture or a few words about why you are there.
3. A reading. A passage from scripture or a poem, read by the officiant or a family member.
4. Prayer or remarks. A prayer, or a few words from someone in the family.
5. The committal. The words that commit the body to its resting place.
6. Closing prayer or blessing. Often the Lord's Prayer, and a blessing to send everyone on their way.
7. Flowers or earth. If the family wishes, guests place a flower on the casket, or a handful of earth, before they leave.

On the program, one line for each part is enough, with the names beside them:

1. Gathering
2. Opening words — [officiant's name]
3. Reading — [scripture reference or poem], read by [name]
4. Remarks — [name]
5. Committal
6. Closing prayer and blessing
7. Placing of flowers

Harold's committal after the Mass

Harold Pruitt's funeral Mass was followed by his burial, and the back page of his program says so in one line: "Interment at Holy Cross Cemetery, followed by lunch in the parish hall." Guests bring the program with them from the church, and the committal needs none of its own.

In the Catholic Church, the committal follows a set order: an invitation, a verse of scripture, a prayer over the place of committal, the committal itself, intercessions, the Lord's Prayer, a concluding prayer, and a prayer over the people. A priest or deacon ordinarily leads it. The Mass before it is in the Catholic funeral Mass, step by step.

What to print for a service outdoors

• Keep it small. For a graveside-only service, a single card or a small folded sheet is enough: the name and dates, the order, and a line of thanks. Some families print none at all.
• Print fewer copies. A graveside group is often smaller than a congregation, so count the people you expect and add a few. There is more on counting in how many funeral programs to print.
• Plan for the weather. Wind and damp are hard on thin paper. Heavier paper or card holds up better, and a folder keeps the copies dry until they are handed out. Large, clear type is easier to read standing up, in bright sun or in shade.
• Print the way to the grave where it helps. When the burial follows a service elsewhere, the program for that service can give the cemetery's name and address, the entrance to use and the section or a landmark near the grave: "[Cemetery name], [address]. Enter by the [north] gate; the grave is in Section [number], near the chapel." A cemetery is not a home, so all of this is safe to print. For a service held only at the grave, guests are already there when the card is handed out, so put the directions in the obituary or the invitation; the card can still name the section, for anyone who comes back to visit.
• Say what happens after. Where everyone is welcome to gather afterward, and at what time.

If you make the program here, start from any of the wizard's starting orders, or none, and change it line by line. A section you leave empty is left off the printed program.

Military funeral honors

If the person served in the armed forces, the family can ask for military funeral honors. By law, an eligible veteran's honors include, at the least:

• a detail of at least two uniformed members of the armed forces, one of them from the veteran's own branch of service
• the playing of Taps, by a bugler if one is available, or otherwise as a recording, sometimes on a ceremonial bugle
• the folding of the United States flag, and its presentation to the next of kin

Depending on eligibility and who is available, the honors can also include a rifle volley, a color guard or military pallbearers. There is no cost to the family.

Arranging them. Ask the funeral director as soon as you can. The funeral director contacts the military to arrange the honors, and will need the veteran's discharge papers, usually the DD Form 214, to confirm eligibility. If you cannot find it, say so; other discharge papers can be used. The Department of Defense recommends at least 48 hours' notice. Veterans service organizations can also help, and staff at a VA national cemetery can say whom to contact.

Who is eligible. Service members who die on active duty, and veterans who left the service with an honorable discharge or one under honorable conditions, among others. The funeral director can check.

On the program. A line such as "Military Funeral Honors" tells guests what is happening. The officiant and the funeral director agree where the honors come in the service, and some churches ask that flowers or earth be placed only after the honors are complete.

At a VA national cemetery, the committal service is typically held in a committal shelter rather than at the grave, and the burial follows afterward. The program can call it a committal service at the cemetery. Families can bring flowers to go with the casket or urn to the grave.

Religious and non-religious services

In church traditions, the committal has words of its own. In the Book of Common Prayer of the Episcopal Church, they are said as earth is cast on the coffin, and they include the words "earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust". In the United Methodist service, the pastor may cast earth on the coffin as it is lowered. A Catholic committal after a funeral Mass follows the order above; when no funeral liturgy comes first, the priest or deacon uses a form of the committal that includes the final commendation. Other faiths have their own rites and customs for burial, and your clergy will know them.

Without religion, the service keeps the same shape. A poem or a piece of prose takes the place of scripture, a few words of farewell take the place of the committal prayer, and a moment of quiet can close it. A family member, a friend or a celebrant can lead it. For how a full service before the committal can run, see a simple funeral order of service.